So many people are under the impression that the husband being the head of the household makes him some kind of lord over his wife. The scriptures are very clear on how a husband is to treat his wife.
When a man courts a woman, it is called “winning her hand” for a reason. The woman is to submit to the man who she takes to be her husband.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
So the man has to prove he is worthy to have the woman submit to him. She has to decide that she will be able to rely on him to provide for the family. It is his responsibility to provide for and protect the family. The woman is the nester. She is who takes care of the household and the children, so she has to know the man that is presenting himself to her to be her husband is going to be reliable, dependable.
Scripture also says that the woman gets to have her “own” husband.
Colossians 3:18 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.”
So she deserves a man who does not have other wives or mistresses on the side. She is to be his only wife and he is supposed to honor her.
As the head of the household the husband is to sacrifice himself to his wife as Jesus sacrificed Himself to the church.
Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;”
The husband is to love his wife as he loves his own body.
Ephesians 5:28-31 “So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.”
How many of us have heard a man complain about his wife behind her back? What does scripture say about that?
Colossionas 3:19 “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.”
It is dishonor for a man to talk poorly about his wife behind her back when he visits with his friends or goes shopping at the builder supply. It is the husband’s job, his duty to make his wife happy. The old maxim, “Happy wife, happy life.” is not something that he does to appease his wife just to keep her from nagging at him. The husband’s number one priority, well, just under God, is to make his wife happy. When a man truly loves his wife, he will put her happiness above his own. When he puts her happiness above his own, he will reap the benefit of having a wife who does not nag at him, who respects him and who will also seek to make him happy.
Many men have the attitude “I am not going to bow down to her.” or some think, “I am not going to do whatever until she does.” You cannot have it both ways. If the husband is the head of the household, he is who has to put forth the effort first. It is his job and duty to his wife to provide everything she could ever need or want, for that matter. It is not spoiling his wife to desire to do for her everything that would make her happy to be married to him. It keeps peace in the home. The number one reason that a woman will cheat on her husband is because she does not feel loved. So you husbands take responsibility for your wives happiness and make her feel loved.
When man takes responsibility for his wife’s unhappiness, he will find that he is much happier and will actually take pleasure from making his wife happy. That does not mean that every man will make every woman happy. Sometimes a man and woman should never have gotten married to begin with. But if a man and woman do refrain from sexual intercourse until they get married, the man will have proven to the woman his love for her is true and it is likely their marriage will be a success. How can the woman know for sure the man truly loves her if he is not willing to wait for her until their wedding night.
So you men make your wives happiness a priority in your life and you truly will have a happy life. The scripture says you are to sacrifice yourself to her. If you are to follow God’s word, you do not get to choose otherwise. The only choice you have is don’t get married.